Fighting through a hangover early Monday morning, heading home to change and shower, I raced toward the subway restroom to heed the extremely urgent call of nature.  Evidently, 6am is a popular time for reading in the restroom, because all stalls were occupied.  Deciding to chance using the handicapped option rather than any other number of bad ideas, I closed the sliding frosted glass door and made it just in time.  The seat immediately began warming itself, a few moments later a fresh scent of pine wafted through the room.  This was one of the magic Korean toilets I had heard about and was now experiencing.  Afterwards, I had trouble finding a button whose picture matched the flushing motion.  I pushed a big button hoping for the best and 3 seconds later felt a sharp stream darting between my legs.  I leapt from the warm seat cursing in confusion when the sharp stream, now obvious as a bidet, shot me in the face and mouth.  It was a rough wake up call, but laughed off as I dried myself and made the next train south.  BTW, it turns out, to flush, one must only close the lid.