Losers. No More. Eagles Are Champions.

I didn’t cry until I heard Merrill Reese, the longtime radio voice of the Eagles, on YouTube the day after the Super Bowl. His call of the Tom Brady fumble with two minutes left in the fourth quarter pushed the release button. The emotions, the memories, the Sundays, the halftime catches in the backyard, the Monday mornings discussing the game, the plastic cups and t-shirts emblazoned with a mean green eagle, the cheesesteaks, the fireplace and TV on cold winter afternoons, the time with my family. Three generations watching our beloved birds struggle toward the excellence other teams seemed to stumble into. Continue reading

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What I Think About the National Anthem Protests: NFL Players Can Kneel & Trump Is a Bum

A grandfather, father and son; three generations of William Sabia’s; three generations of Philly sports fans used to go watch 18 baseball games every summer. We watched them together from our right field seats all through my younger and more vulnerable years. We watched the best years with the mullet brigade of 1993 that lost the World Series to a bunch of Canadian hosers. We also watched the worst years of Philadelphia Phillies baseball. The years when future Hall of Shamers Von Hayes or Steve Jeltz were the best players, the years when the stadium was a non-descript, circular, multi-purpose green hole called Veterans Stadium. Continue reading

How to Fix Boxing in 3 Easy Steps

Floyd “Money for My Lawyers” Mayweather and Manny “No Birth Control” Pacquiao recently fought to a unanimously boring decision in Mayweather’s favor. A total of 229 punches were landed in the fight, which averages to six per minute or 19 per round (a small number compared to the real “fight of the century” Ward v. Gatti in 2002 when those punch-happy crowd-pleasers combined for a staggering average of 17 punches landed per minute and 51 per round). Continue reading

Hunting, Hemingway and Eating Meat

The Internet helps us keep up with trending topics such as Toronto mayor Rob Ford’s amazingly embarrassing but slightly humanizing descent into crack-smoking, drunken hilarity, awesome viral videos like JCVD doing badass splits on the side mirrors of two massive big rigs, and moral outrage through informative posts about gay bashing, dolphin killing or suffering in general. Sometimes there is a post that comes through the newsfeed on Facebook that touches me, or hurts me, or makes me LOL (:>) Continue reading

Hockey Memories of Mine

“I went to a fight the other night, and hockey game broke out.” –Rodney Dangerfield

In the late spring, as cherry blossoms fall, piling into fragrant fluffs of street detritus, and the Celsius rises, thoughts wander into the casual, carefree realm of summer loving, beach time and sticky nights with sweating mugs of cold beer. Some of us are preparing holidays among tranquil, azure blue waters and overpriced fusion food. College kids are looking for pointless summer jobs, teachers are counting the days until finals, and baby ducks follow mama in that amazingly cute waddle toward the pond. That pond, only six months ago, was frozen in a sheet of glass from previous nights of sub-zero temperatures. And in those brief moments, those fleeting moments of winter daylight, those short-lived days before the snow covers the ice, young children of the north live out hockey fantasies. Continue reading

Steroids Are The Future

It’s old news now that Lance Armstrong, the promoter of the LiveStrong campaign, the man who won a grueling 2,000 mile bicycle race seven times in a row, lost a testicle to cancer, and still had the balls to leave the mother of his children who supported him after the cancer treatments to get together with Sheryl Crow, is a lying, doping, remorseless man. He repeated ad nauseum about how he was racing clean and didn’t need any performance enhancing drugs (PED’s). Continue reading

Football Runs on America

Most sports fans in America are a fan of two sports, football, and any one of the others. I know I’m generalizing, but it is certainly the most popular sport in the USA. Living abroad, the NFL season appears out of nowhere. We are not subject to the onslaught of misleading preseason games, training camp dramas, draft day projections or constant SportsCenter coverage. It’s not to say I wasn’t unaware that it was approaching, it just wasn’t in the forefront of my mind. Football is the opiate of the masses in America. It is the great pacifier of the American male. As long as they have NFL games on Sunday, they could never assemble into government attacking militias, and I think those powers that be understand this fact. They would never have allowed that strike to happen at a time when unemployment is high and houses are being foreclosed. It is a desperately symbiotic relationship.

I watch the games onDemand through the Internet. The season opening game of defending champs NY Giants and the Cowboys of Dallas began as most games do, with the national anthem. It is the rallying cry for unity in the stadium and in the homes before the brutal, concussive combat and geographical animosity expressed by the colors of the jerseys turns average men into anxious Romans at the Coliseum salivating for violence on God’s day of rest. We know the feeling of testosterone surging and the way we catch ourselves gritting our teeth on 3rd and long or 4th and 1. We know the way we hate a player and know he is a disgrace—until he plays for our team. We know that Sunday is for football; it is comforting. The national anthem is that unifying moment where we all can remember it’s just a game and that it’s freedom that makes it possible. What is a little too symbolic is the flyover.

“Please rise for the singing of the national anthem…followed by a flyover of three Blackhawk helicopters,” said the announcer. Queen Latifah had a cool, new, hip-hop version of the song, which surprised and slightly annoyed me at first, but quickly grew on me. I like that it can be updated. And any excuse to repeat the favorite line of armchair singers “…home of the brave,” will be a desired change. The helicopters flew over the giant, glistening MetLife stadium in North Jersey after the last goose-bump inducing line was delivered, and a wild roar surged from the crowd. I realized they were cheering because those flying machines were on our side. They were cheering for how safe having those flying machines make us feel. They were cheering because war, and the elements of war, makes us feel something. It makes us feel a strange humility bred with arrogance for our great nation. Americans alive today have grown up on warfare and only had a handful of years when some foreign war was not involving the USA. We have tacitly given consent over the last half-century into the military-industrial complex. It is our economy. We produce beautiful celebrities and beautiful weapons. I’m not quite sure where it’s leading us, but being involved in two wars, the purposefully endless War on Terror and the fact that Hollywood will never run out of a pretty face to manipulate, makes it a safe bet that behavior continues. Beyond the subliminal jingoism of a flyover, it also reeks of an unintentional indoctrination though. It’s as if some invisible powers are telling us: “These jets and helicopters make this game possible, so don’t worry about the inconceivable amount of tax money we spend to keep them shiny and updated, and just enjoy the game.”

It’s completely natural to respect your country’s military. It’s natural to feel a bit of flag-waving patriotism when you see the might that is our arsenal. Somehow it just felt like a commercial when those helicopters flew over the Meadowlands.

You Never Get a Second Chance.

Missouri football coach, Gary Pinkel, said he believes it’s “wrong” to place sole blame on Joe Paterno for the colossal clusterf#$% that has happened at PSU. He believes Joe would act differently if he could; that if he could “do it all over again” he would have acted differently and done more. Unfortunately, nobody gets that option. If you did have the chance, you wouldn’t make mistakes because you would know through hindsight what was the right decision. If Napoleon could do it over, he wouldn’t “get involved in a land war in Asia” and Bush has said repeatedly he would do things differently if he could go back. Nobody is afforded that luxury, which is what makes life so hard, you aren’t given second chances, ever.

Sci-fi movies have looked into this idea on many occasions, hardly ever with a positive outcome. Although theoretically, the idea of relativity posits time as an unending line of outcomes whereby the past, future and present exist in one eternal moment, and all your choices have already been chosen, by you, so if we can bend it by speeding rapidly between two points on that line, we could move through time. However, we are far from the light speed, or even “ludicrous” speed necessary for such travel. Until then, we are left in our limbo of present.

I believe it’s unfair to place sole blame of child abuse on Paterno. He was not the one responsible for it, but he did not stop it. Paterno ran that show; he could have had them erect ten statues of him on campus. As soon as he found out about wrongdoing to children, he should have ended it, because that is what you do when you have power to end suffering. But, anyone old enough to have moved past the powerful naiveté of the post teenage years knows that once you have power, you are more susceptible to misconduct. Look at politicians who harass, caress and sexualize the women around them. Look at priests who do the same to the alter boys around them. Look at the CEO’s of AIG or Lehman Brothers who duped their stockholders, but kept their jobs because they were in charge of hiring and firing. It takes a special kind of person to remain judicious and fair once given the keys to a kingdom.

I’m so upset by this scandal, and how a man who I used to watch (with great admiration) on Saturdays, all my life, could have had such indifference to one group of people, while having such misplaced dedication to another. He reminded me of my grandfather; he was such a goofy looking guy with his giant (hipster before hipster was fashionable) glasses, huge Italian nose and floodwater rolled khakis. Appearances can be deceiving. He lost his truth in the vacuum of fallacy that is modern college athletics. Division 1 football is a moneymaker, and once money reaches a certain priority, it is protected at all levels, at all costs. Although the good he did cannot be erased by what he failed to do, it is marred and scarred forever.

Today, I finished reading the biography of Steve “Crocodile Hunter” Irwin, written by his wife, Terri. I was always a fond fan of his shows, his Australian patois, his ceaseless energy, his complete love of all wildlife and his dedication to conservationism. I knew how the story ended, I knew almost all the events, but it was nice to get the inside version of how it happened. Throughout the book, I learned that Steve had premonitions of not making to age 40. He was committed to making each moment count. I cried when I got to the death section, even though I knew by the title it was coming. I tried to remind myself, here was a man who lived his life, how he wanted to, with pure energy and elan, and presumably had no regrets. It got me thinking.

I used to think I wanted to live my life with no regrets, but as I am learning—that is impossible. I regret not talking to this or that girl who passed me in the street. I regret not seeing the Musee D’Orsay. I regret not spending more time with my 3 deceased grandparents when they were alive. I totally regret not seeing Steve Irwin’s Australia Zoo when I passed through Brisbane in 2003. He might have been there and I might have seen him do a show in the “crocoseum,” his specially built gladiator ring to show off the big “salties.” Beside the Museum in Paris, I missed those chances. Regret is just another part of the anxiety of life, unavoidable at times. It is remorse we must avoid.

Steve Irwin won’t be remorseful for diving with those stingrays, he did it before; he also wrangled venomous snakes and fish, wrestled four-meter crocodiles, chased down emus, and climbed trees with orangutans. He did it for a living, and he knew he couldn’t last long with those odds stacked against him. He may regret leaving his young children and true love behind, but he loved them while he could. What early, untimely death isn’t filled with that stinging regret of lost time to give more love where it was needed? He died leaving his love spread as wide as the outback.

Paterno has a different culmination. He most certainly died filled with remorse. He was probably a good man, lost in that vacuum that supreme power can create. He probably let the regret of keeping Sandusky around bite into him every day until it became a cancerous mound of remorse. I know he was 85, and had lung cancer, but he died three months after the indictment of Sandusky. Could the regret have metastasized into a cancerous form of deathly remorse?

One of my favorite Beatles songs, “Within You, Without You,” written by George Harrison, has a line that seems apropos to this situation. “And to see you’re really only very small, and life flows on within you and without you. We were talking about the love that’s gone so cold and the people who gain the world and lose their soul.” Poor Joe definitely had the world of football in his hands: respect, awards, championships, and unbreakable records. He lost his caring, giving soul (the one that must have led him to coaching) in the process of reaching those dizzying heights of success.

The Dalai Lama understands people, and the human condition; he feels the flow of the universe in his veins. Steve Irwin understands animals this way. You can tell he actually believes that that cobra in his calloused hands is “gorgeous,” or that the thorny devil with her mottled brown spots and scaly exterior is truly a “pretty little bugga.” I have cried during every single “Crocodile Hunter” episode I’ve ever watched. At some point in his bush excursions, Steve would come upon a dying echidna or a kangaroo that was hit by a car, and you couldn’t help but be affected by Steve’s genuine concern for them. He would sit by them, stroking and consoling them, but realize they were too far-gone and tell the camera, “It’s too late, all we can do is stay here as long as we can and make them as comfortable as possible.” I remember one episode where there had been a huge bushfire due to drought conditions, and Steve and Terri ran around frantically collecting spiders from the burning charred desert landscape. He cared so much for the plight of wildlife, and it was contagious. Steve Irwin is a recognizable and legitimate hero. I don’t even want to think how let down I would have been to find out that Steve was arrested for allowing people at his zoo to sell crocodile skin for tacky shoes or shark fins for some overpriced soup.